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Law of Mechanical
Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will
begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped,
will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of probability: The probability of being
watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you
were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you
will have a flat tire.
Variation Law: If you change lines (or
traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one
you are in now.
(works every time)
Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone
Law of Close Encounters: The probability of
meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't
want to be seen with.
Law of the Result: When you try to prove to
someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the
itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Theatre Rule: At any event, the people whose
seats are furthest from the aisle will arrive last.
Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a
cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last
until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only
two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an
open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are
directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
Law of Location: No matter where you go,
there you are.
Law of Logical Argument: Anything is
possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no
Wilson 's Law: As soon as you find a product
that you really like, they will stop making it.